Wednesday, May 30, 2012


(Quote of the Week)
"I don't think my father, the inventor of toaster strudel, will be too pleased to hear about this."

I use it frequently..

Monday, May 14, 2012

people of Walmart, creep edition.

Hello all, and happy belated Mother's day. Procrastination is one of my stronger talents, so for my mom I decided to run to Walmart the night before the big day. I grabbed her a nice bouquet of flowers, but it didn't feel like that was enough for my amazing mother. I decided to take a trip to the kitchen aisle to see what other trinkets I could find. Not many people need kitchen accessories at midnight on a Saturday, so I was surprised to be approached by a semi-dirty, unshaven man in a Hooter's t-shirt and army hat. He asked me about my mom, and the flowers I was carrying for her. He seemed friendly enough, so I figured he needed some help picking out a gift. He then proceeded to tell me how "fine" I am, and asked if I had ever considered modeling. I was really taken off-guard, and didn't know what to do. I wanted to be polite, so I listened as he gave me a "proposition"... To make this long conversation short, he basically asked me to be a naked model in a porno with his two "tall, thick and muscular" black boyfriends. He explained how amazing these black men are, how much I would love them, and how I was the perfect girl that they needed; as I stood there with what I can imagine was the most hopeless, frightened look on my face. I told him, "I have a boyfriend, I'm sorry, I can't help you..." and tried to get away from him. He blocked all exits from the secluded aisle, and kept shoving his phone in my face. "Please, can I just have your number while you think about it? We NEED you. You are just so pretty. This will change your life, I promise you will love it. It doesn't matter that you have a boyfriend." I was frantically trying to get away, but he was persistent. Finally, he asked my age. I told him, and he immediately booked it for the exit of the store. I stood, flowers in hand, jaw dropped, blood racing, and watched him leave Walmart. My parents were gone for the weekend, so I had to drive home alone, to a house with 4 sleeping children. Needless to say, I didn't sleep much that night.

There are many morals to this story, so here's my list:
1. Don't procrastinate
2. Don't talk to strange men in Hooter's shirts when you're alone... they aren't asking you what they should buy for their wife
3. Don't go to Walmart after midnight
4. Don't try to be polite to creepers. Just tell them to "Get the **** away from me."
5. And last but not least, watch this video.

Words of wisdom from: Holly :)

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Sunday, April 29, 2012

Marky Mark

 Mark Wahlberg was born in the Dorchester neighborhood of Boston Massachusets, the youngest of nine children.
His parents Divorced in 1982
Wahlberg claims to have been in trouble 20–25 times with the Boston Police Department as a youth. By the age of 13, Wahlberg had developed an addiction to cocaine and other substances. At 15, he harassed a group of black school children on a field trip by throwing rocks and shouting racial epithets. When he was 16, Wahlberg approached a middle-aged Vietnamese man on the street and, using a large wooden stick, knocked him unconscious. He also attacked another Vietnamese man, leaving him permanently blind in one eye, and attacked a security guard (using racist language).
For these crimes, Wahlberg was charged with attempted murder, pled guilty to assault, and was sentenced to two years in jail at Boston's Deer Island House of Correction, of which he served 45 days. In another incident, the 21-year-old Wahlberg fractured the jaw of a neighbor in an unprovoked attack. Commenting in 2006 on his past crimes, Wahlberg has stated: "I did a lot of things that I regret, and I have certainly paid for my mistakes."
After landing in prison he decided to change his ways. According to Wahlberg, "As soon as I began that life of crime, there was always a voice in my head telling me I was going to end up in jail. Three of my brothers had done time. My sister went to prison so many times I lost count. Finally I was there, locked up with the kind of guys I'd always wanted to be like. Now I'd earned my stripes and I was just like them, and I realized it wasn't what I wanted at all. I'd ended up in the worst place I could possibly imagine and I never wanted to go back. First of all, I had to learn to stay on the straight and narrow."
"I've made a lot of mistakes in my life and I've done bad things, but I never blamed my upbringing for that. I never behaved like a victim so that I would have a convenient reason for victimizing others. Everything I did wrong was my own fault. I was taught the difference between right and wrong at an early age. I take full responsibility."
Wahlberg first came to fame as the younger brother of Donnie Whalberg of the successful 1980s and 1990s boy band New Kids On The Block Mark, at age thirteen, had been one of the group's original members.
However, he soon quit. 
Wahlberg began recording as Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch.
Wahlberg dropped the "Marky Mark" moniker and began an acting career, making his debut in the 1993 TV movie The Substitute
Sounds like there is hope for everyone :)
He might be getting old, but let's be honest, he's still a babe.
Good Vibrations: Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch.
Seriously good stuff.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Please read.
Your life will be greatly...enriched.. if that's the word to use..

p.s. I don't like this new layout.
It took me like 10 days to figure out how to post something.

p.p.s. Since we are talking about men, I thought i should tell you that I now have a boyfriend. His name is Tom Hardy (below) We are in love, haven't you heard.. how we rock each others world? Cuz he's just a boy and I'm just a girl?.. I think I may just love him. 
Uhmm, yeah..
Love Laur

Tuesday, April 17, 2012


what?! who's that in the middle? TAYLOR DAVIS.
for you lauren............................................
my elementary class

your welcome, amy 

Sunday, April 15, 2012

I claim this idea. sorry, you cant use it

Remember that time I said I wanted to show you this video?
Yeah, it's finally here.
And i'm using it.
Done deal.